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Shy love: How to express your love

Written by: Gunborg Palme, certified psychologist and certified psychotherapist, teacher and tutor in psychotherapy.
First version: 22 Jul 2008. Latest version: 21 Aug 2008.

Abstract:

If you love somebody, but are too shy to tell, sometimes you have to do things you are afraid of. Whenever you have a nice or loving thought, tell them.

Question:

I have problems talking to my boyfriend. He thinks I'm not interested in him, when in reality I just have a hard time expressing myself for fear of rejection, am too shy to express my love. How can I overcome this?

Answer:

Would it be easier for you to write him a letter? Could you possibly show him your letter to me?

It is not easy to cure shyness. Often, it's a lifelong condition that keeps you from getting as much from life as more outgoing individuals do. It's easier to get what you want out of life if you are daring. But it is true that many shy people grow less afraid with time.

You say that you are afraid of feeling rejected, but in fact it's your boyfriend who's feeling rejected because you're not showing enough interest and affection.

You can't go through life being afraid. You have to do things, even if they frighten you. It's like parachute jumping -- you feel great anxiety and don't really know where you are going to land. Did you make a fool of yourself, or will everything turn out okay?

Whenever you think positive and loving thoughts about your boyfriend, speak them out loud, without thinking first. Take the risk of being rejected instead of rejecting him. And I promise, you will not be rejected! People are happy to receive all the love they can get.

More Information
Sources, references: http://web4health.info/en/answers/source/life-shy-love.htm
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