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KOM2002 (plain)  Past Boyfriends

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reply Re: Past Boyfriends , Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92 , 29 Sep 2004 12:45
plain Past Boyfriends , ****** , 28 Sep 2004 15:03
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Past Boyfriends
From: ******
Date: Tue, 28 Sep 2004 15:03:03 +0200
Language: English

 


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Hello,

I have been married now for 3 years. Prior to marrying my wife, she had 2 ex-boyfriends that she was intimate with that she kept friendships with. When we got married, I told her that it hurt me for her to communicate with these guys and so she stopped. My wife and I now have a divorce on file, yet trying to make the marriage work. Once I filed for the divorce, she called up these guys for advice. She has now told me that if we are to get back together, it is important for her to have casual communication with these guys ie; e-mail and phone conversation. Otherwise she will feel resentful for giving up these relationships like she did in the beginning of the marriage. This problem has plagued our marriage ever since the beginning. She feels resentful for having to give up these guys totally, and I feel hurt and resentful anytime she communicates with them. What advice do you have.
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Re: Past Boyfriends (Reply to: 34269 from ****** )
From: Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92
Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 16:49:24 +0200
Language: Swedish , English

 


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I understand both of you. You need to find a solution you both can accept.

Your wife has no sexual relationship with these men, she needs to have them as friends in her life. You can't ask of her to give up her friends, what you can do is explain how you feel.

Maybe you can find female friends that you can have contact with or maybe you can invite them for dinner so that you get to know them and can see for yourself that nothing is going on. In time, they might become your friends too.




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KOM 2002