My love

Hi
I am 34 and still unmarried. working as a lecturer. coming from a strong christian family. i love my parents very much. Now i am in love with a person who is 6 years younger than me and from another religion. He is jobless but have equal educational qualification as mine. My parents are dead against this and they have searched another christian alliance for me and even the marriage date is fixed, but still i am not able to cope with the idea of getting married to someone else when i love some one else. We both have spoken to my parents regarding our love and they have bluntly refused. My mom even threatens that they will die if they come to know of something like we marrying so i was frightened coz i love my parents. so i just kept silent and the marriage work is going on very quickly the man whom they have selected is too huge compared to me but has a good charatcer and working in a government post with a permanent salary.I am now confused whether to accept to my parents wish as i have done so far or to go against them. If i go against them i have to face many problems like he is job less, but i still cant forget him i dont know wat to do.please help me

Hi
I can understand how you feel and also how your parents feel. But first of all are you committed and confident that you are old enough to make a decision and face & live up to the consequences of it? If yes, then i would say know what you want, be truthful to yourself and then sit down calmly to talk to your parents & assure them that you love them and this is in no way a decision you are making to hurt them - but rather that you want to take full responsibility for your life and that you have made this decision. Remember any problem is only temporary - that it will be permanent if we choose to make it permanent. You can never control other people's reaction or opinions - they are entitled to their choices. And if they choose to shun you or cut you off even though you have not done anything drastically wrong, then it is purely their choice and decision and they too will need to learn how to let go and not try to enforce their way.
As for your young man, why can't he get a job and when is he going to get one? Age is only but a number - something which you need to accept yourself and not expect others to jump for joy - its a non traditional step to take, even though many do it - but its still not a fully accepted norm.
We will all face challenges in life - esp when we least expect it one will be thrown to us for us to get tougher and to learn from. So be truthful to yourself, be preapared for a tough life ahead - but that's normal.