Young marriage

I am really lost in all my marriage. too many things i can talk about. but basically i can say for now:
i am 21 now. my husband 25. we are married for 2 years.

-> i moved from my country, to be with him. i was really happy in my life, but i thought my marriage will bring me even more happiness, love, passion. but 2 years, are like a war to me. i have nobody to talk to, somebody understand me. i do whatever a normal wife would do for a husband. whatever he asks. i advice. whatever his decision is, or whatever he is planning and enjoys to do, i m there for him. just to make him happy. he want to open a new business, i am running fixing every single detail. he is sick, i am getting up and searching for any medicine, pharmacy.. and so on. cleaning, washing, taking care of his 10 birds. working. and so on. BUT. when i ask him a single thing like. to not through the ash of cig. on the floor or in the mag, he will say ok. but will do it. i will write for him please.. dont.. he will say ok. and so on. thats sounds funny, but its the simplest example i gave. we came to the point of divorce lets say..100 time. but i keep believing, that its not easy and we gonna solve it..so i stay. getting even better.. but he.. he stays as he is. saying what i did wrong? i dont do anything? you have whatever you want.. food, house..
he is saying he did his best to make me happy.
i did my best for sure. the only thing i did not maybe lick his ***.
he is nervous and angry 24/7. whole 2 years. saying that he has problems.. staring from, he feels sick. or finishing because his friend said something, i should understand it. yes but not for 2 years!! at the end he said.. that i make him nervous from the morning. that he is not happy from me. so why he holds me? for so long? he likes to hurt people?

Try listening to your husband/ give him space. Let him do the things he likes to do- even throwing ash on the floor. Just let him be. Ask yourself if he is a good person/ husband. And pl try and not nag- may be that is what makes him nervous. Life is not a fairy tale- get real. Does he provide for you? Is good to you- then pl look over his shortcomings.

my mouth was closed for two years. but it's getting worse and worse. less appriciation.

Is it possible that he is into substance abuse? spends long hours in bathroom? Are his pupils dilated? Does he have alcohol problem? Could he be in trouble with the law? If none of these, then may be he is worried and nervous about some work/ finance related problem- try gain his confidence and get to the root of the problem- that is if you wish to continue with the marriage. Also, find completion in who you are- why look for validation in another person? Find channels to divert your energy/ get into socially relevant work/ get a job/ take up a hobby. Try and find fulfillment in your own personality- that can come if you do something more than housework, as clearly that can not be exciting all the time.

He does not have any problem with alcohol, or drugs. he smokes alot. plus he does not know what he wants in his head. he is opening a new business now. i have a business degree, and was giving him alot of ideas, and said, i will make my best for the business, managing, finance and so on.. design ideas, advertising. he would not even listen tomy ideas, would do whatever he wants. listening to another people, spending with them long hours after full time work. he is coming home, only after i am in bed, leaving house before i am awake, sometimes, i dont even know, if he was sleeping in the house. we did not fight, he just stopped calling me during the day, when i was calling him, he was really rude. and not talking to me at home. i do have a hobby, i am a dancer, and i do work with it. thats the thing i love the most in my life. but he is not allowing me to do so. concerts. he does not like when i communicate to the people after 7 p.m even to go for a coffee. to bring friends to the house, seems also a problem for him, only after he comes. its seems crazy, but i feel whatever what will make me exciting in the life, he would refuse.

Young marriage is really a difficult thing to do. I was also belong to young marriage, I was only 19 at that time. At first we are so happy that I always thought that no one can take us apart. As times goes by everything became worse and worse. But I never gave up. I gave him space, to be alone so that he could think about us. It takes time, I just think positively, I pray always and pictured all the good times we had in the past.Right now were okey,even though he is away.

i like your last line, about you are ok, he is away. i also could be ok, if he gonna be away. the point is, how to get back to these gooooood times, spending time together happily.. not apart.

Don't criticize him. Don't demand things from him. Ask him in a nice way what you want from him. And, most important, whenever he does what you want, show your appreciation clearly - i.e. give him love when he does what you want.

I he is nervous and angry 24/7, he should go to a psychiatrist or psychotherapist to get help with his problems.