Help please

Sorry if this doesn't make sense, im just gona write what im feeling, it mite look like a load of jibberish.

I don't know what to do please help me some-one. Iv'e just turned 19, and just finished my first year at university studying phototgraphy. For years i have found it extremely difficult to make friends and i get really anxious and shy around people. My older brother was quite shy when he was younger, but now at 23 he has so much confidence it's unreal, even my younger 12 year old sister has loads more confidence than me. My mum said she was exactly the same as me when she was younger, worse even and says that i have done well to do what i have done, like go to college and university, i thought and really hoped things would change when i got to uni but they havn't. I didn't get on with my flatmates, and only made a few Acquaintances, not really people who i can call my friends and it was exactly the same at college. Ive been with my boyriend scince i was 14 and we are really happy but i want a group of friends i can go out with aswell, if i didnt have my boyfriend, i dont know what i would do coz hes like the only person that ive got. I feel jelous of him sometimes coz he has a really large group of friends and is mega confident, he can talk 2 any1, i go out with him and his friends (male and female) but i find it difficult to make conversation with them eventhough they are really nice. When i do manage to talk 2 them i think that they think that i am wierd and boring so that makes me even more nervous so i start to go red and my hands start to shake. I feel like my shyness is taking over my life, i hate answering the door and hate speaking to people on the phone. Im trying to get a job for the summer, ive had two previous jobs in the past, a waitressing job and a bar job, even these didn't help me, i used to make mistakes because i was nervous, im a really hard worker once i have got a job and im a really honest person i just cant seem to get anywhere.
Id love to be a photographer but im starting to doubt myself as you have to be really good with people and confident which i arnt. But i havnt got a clue what i want to do if i dont do this so im just feeling really fed up and down. Do you think therapy would help me at all? If so what kind of therapist would i need coz i havnt got a clue.

Sorry for rambling on, i just feel so down xx

Hi There!

Try talking to yourself, looking in the mirror- do that when you are alone or with family members who will understand that you are trying to get out of the 'shy mode'.

Its easy. Say whatever you have to say with confidence.

Try to remember the expressions/ words that others use and use the same. Read so that you can talk about what you have read. Start with something small, like 'so how do you like the food/ movie' etc- and depending on the response just let the conversation flow. Discuss what is happening in the world/ country/ state/ city/ neighbourhood.

Compliment others- that makes them predisposed towards you- that is to say they will be more attentive to you if you say something like 'I notice you speak well' or 'you are well read' or 'that is a nice dress that you are wearing' or ask for advise or ask for suggestions- people love that. Once they have accepted you - rest is easy.

You may be red/ nervous etc as you have convinced yourself that that is what you are, and all the time you are scared of turnig red/ nervous- and that itself makes you nervous.

Convince that you are a confident person, that you are well read, talk about the subjects that you know about, viz photography- you will find it comes easy if we talk about things that we love.

Never ever feel that anyone is better than you. Feel self pride- repeat all the good qualities that you have. Try to assume a confident stance as other so called 'confident people', and bingo, you will start feeling confident!

Only you can make yourself feel confident- only you can convince who you are. You are nervous, if you tell yourslef that you are nervous. You are confident if you tell yourself that you are confident!

You are only 19- don't let anything pressurise you- take your time in 'finding' your trueself.

Take a public speaking course- join a group of photographers, deliberately do activities that require you to interact with people- all these activities will help you shed the shyness and make friends for you!

Its not end of the world- its just something that you need to work on!

Chin UP!!!