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Disappointed in your Parents; Mother; Father

Written by: Gunborg Palme, certified psychologist and certified psychotherapist, teacher and tutor in psychotherapy.
First version: 22 Jul 2008. Latest version: 18 Aug 2008.

Abstract:

Your feelings for your mother are wellfounded.

Question:

My mom was everything I am not. She was unmotivated, chose to live on welfare, despite opportunities to change her life (i.e. social services job training, inheritance of a large chunk of money, etc.). She was depressed, addicted to tranquilizers, a pack rat who lived with cockroaches and dirt.

How can I resolve my feelings/issues toward my deceased mother?

Answer:

Your feelings are really well-founded. You need to come to grips with your disappointment in your mother, and say a final "good-bye" to her. She chose her way of life, which you cannot accept. You could write a diary, in which you write down all your feelings. Or you could talk to friends, or perhaps you seek help from a psychotherapist.
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