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KOM2002 (plain)  Re: My married man love story

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happy Re: My married man love story , F16835DD10E3A8D66D8D9A1751D412AC , 24 Jun 2011 01:57
Re: My married man love story (Reply to: 110861 from )
From: F16835DD10E3A8D66D8D9A1751D412AC
Date: Fri, 14 Jan 2011 03:46:55 +0100
Language: English

 


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I dont understand whats going on! I am with somebody, and there is distance between us, he lives away from me and with my busy work routine I dont see him as much as I would of liked! Theres a guy at work,and yes hes the married one! I hate myself for letting it get like this. I know its nothing like love, but I cant shake him out my head, and well things started to develop. Well we had to do a thing at work and we had to work togther, and spending time with him felt great. I didnt feel anything physical or out like that, just that I could really talk to him and we got on great as mates, laughed at jokes that we instantly new what each other was thinking. Well we got talking on a social network site, and he starts telling me stuff. I can honestly say I dont know how this stated!! Hes liked me for a while, or so he says, and I just go with the flow, a little teasing here and there, nothing harmful. Until oneday he makes a plan to kiss me at work, I thought it was all fun and games just a little banter, what they dont know wont hurt right?? WRONG! I KNOW. But there we was at work and I chickend the plan, this was real, not a game I thought id play. I start to like him, even more than my own boyfriend at that point, how can this be so. We plan again and again. Then I start thinking of ways so I can text him,talk to him, be near him, things to do with work, asking questions, so he replys. It was fine at first, he started it talking to me, my face lit up every time. I knew it was wrong to feel this way I couldnt control it, I didnt feel guilty what he was doing behind his wife back. Anyway, he stopped replying to some texts and started acting higher at work like he was in charge. Fair enough, I knew it had to stop anyway, lucky we never did anything too bad, just a few kisses etc. I thought id stop, I did stop and i ignored him, gave one worded answers and saw him constantly texting other people, I was jelous! He started texting again asking whats wrong, and asking whats next plan, I said i didnt know, and never gave any answers. But before i knew it he had a hold on me, to make the next plan! I will not give him the satisfaction of controlling me! This wise man once said if your going to cheat, always so it with someone thats with someone, well that wise man taught me and thats what I did, with himself. I may have a few things to lose but he will lose his whole life. Does that make me a bad person. Its not like he loves his wife, because he wouldnt of started this,I feel so bad and guilty toward my partner! I hate myself! Why can i be so foolish? It just lust, amazing how I feel when im with him, how he has a hold on me.HOW THIS MUST STOP! I dont know why i cant, is it because im scared of losing his friendship, and then things been awkard at work, well I dont know. Its not like anything positive affects out of this, hes married, got a kid to another person, 9 years differnce, and had probably had tons of affiars before. Im just a fucked up girl trapped in a fucked up world! Ive put myself in his wifes shoes, and it made me want to hurt myself for knowing id hurt her if this was found out. It has to stop, how? I need answers! Im a destroyer! Sin my now!

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KOM 2002