I understand what your going through.. My SL and I have hit a few hard spots where I have no idea what's going on in his head. Right now is one of them. When we first started seeing eachother it was fun and there were no worries.. well when I moved away to go to college, things changed. We were used to seeing eachother every night and now we couldn't so we started talking every night. Then the talk about feeling started coming up every time we were on the phone. He would always make jokes and say I was falling for him. I was, really hard but I couldn't tell him that because I was so afraid that he didn't feel the same way. So I kept telling him no and that I could never fall for him and stuff like that. Well, he finally pulled it out of me. He admited that he had feelings for me and then made me admit it back. Once that happend, I fell so hard it wasn't even funny. now there were no secrets between us. Anything either of us felt we would say it. Then I moved back home and things started changing.. I didn't stay over night with him like I used to when I would fly into visit and we didn't talk on the phone for hours anymore and when I was with him we would no longer talk about our feelings for eachother, it was more him talking about my feelings for him. IT's very frustrating and onesided! If I work hard enough I get him to talk about his feelings but it takes alot and still doesn't feel like it did before. He says it's because he's afraid of getting too caught up and messing things up at home. I can understand that.. it's true. When people get in over their head they tend to forget about what needs to be taken care of at home and they get caught in the worst way and things go really bad.
So you know... If I were anyone else I would probably tell you to leave it alone and get on with life. But Im not anyone else and I know that untill something happens and you are forced to move on, you wont and cant because you are trapped in you. I think its funny. You do all of the same things I do when Im not with the sl. I go to the movies at least once a week, I shop like no one else and I spend a lot of time at work. It really does help us, in the way that it makes us think we have a life outside of them... but it's really not any help because we do these things alone or with other girls... so the chances of us meeting someone new are slim, but we like it that way.. someone new means no more sl and why would we ever want to lose something like that, even if it is for the best? You just have to stay positive and realize that someone is looking over you and no matter what happens, he's going to make sure your life turns out good. So just sit back go with the flow and if your heels are banging aginst the copy machine on day, yeehaa! look up and praise the lord. If not well, just know that something really great must be coming if you had to give this one up for it! It's hard playing the waiting game sometimes but just think of a way to make it fun.. Get happy and get flirty! What are you doing for lunch thursday? Im thinking lunch with the SL is sounding kinda nice to ya? Try it.. and dont ask how the weekend was.. ask what's new with the kids and the family. Baseball? Ballet?
I love this forum! It really helps in keeping me going! Most of the time Im not even thinking about what email I got from SL but instead.. I spend the whole day wondering if anyone wrote anything new in here.. gotta love addictions! :)
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Today's date: Thu, 21 Jun 2018 16:02:24 +0200