Self esteem

I have a serious problem with self esteem.I dont have any! im not working i have two teen aged kids.Im depressed i have little education.Im dating a married man
an i think that is over at this point.Im at my wits end im so frustrated with my life i want to end it all.ive been called all types of names from people over the years ,ive been molested ,raped as a child from my step father and his brother.I want to die i just dont want to live any more ,I thought of driving my un registered car of the bridge but i think of the kids and how they would feel .However im starting to think they would be better off with out me i cant afford to buy them school clothes i have been looking for work but there is little i can do... my question? what should i do with myself??????????????????????????????????

No, your children would not be better off without you. Your suicide would destroy their lifes. Ask your lover to help you pay an education for you so you can get a job later on. Or ask for public relief. Buy nice second hand clothes for your children. They are much more affordable.