Fear of dating, and mistrust in women.

I am a man that has a fear of introducing myself to women I consider attractive. As a youth I have experienced many embarrassing moments experimenting with dating women. I dated a girl once that "dated" me just to meet a friend of mine. Another girl used me to get her real boyfriend jealous because she caught him cheating on her. that resulted in a violent fist fight between her boyfriend and I. I also dated a girl that cheated on me (I did not catch her, but she was pregnant at 16 while we were dating), someone I knew from the church I attended. I dated a woman from 17 years old until I was 22, She in turn told me that she just wanted to be friends, later i find out because she was seeing someone else for 2 years before our separation. Now, I have not dated a woman in 5 years. I get squeemish anytime i think of dating let alone introducing myself to attractive women. I am a person that never "settle". I have been recieving tremendous pressure from family members to "get a life" or "get a wife". I would like to date again, but I am extremely mistrusting of women, and i easily lose focus when I associate with attractive women. By losing focus, I mean I have a lack of control, and I am nervous about what I would say. I need help with this issue because it seems to be the primary focus of my day. What should I do if I would like to eliminate this problem?