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  Re: relationship dissolution


KOM2002 (plain)  relationship dissolution

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reply Re: relationship dissolution , Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92 , 21 Nov 2005 22:44
plain relationship dissolution , ****** , 13 Nov 2005 12:20
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relationship dissolution
From: ******
Date: Sun, 13 Nov 2005 12:20:03 +0100
Language: English


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I am a 34 year old female who has just recently made a few dramatic changes with her life. I just moved from Boston, MA to Sweden to marry (in Feb. 06) and live with my fiance. My fiance is Swedish. Back in MA is am an attorney who specializes in civil litigation cases. My fiance works with computers. In most manners, we are opposites. I am very outgoing, honest with my feelings, and overtly protected of my friends and family when they have been wronged by another person. He is very much an introvert, extremely quite, and will make extended efforts to please friends and family even when they are wrong. I

The move has not been easy. It has taken nearly one year and 1/2 to finally get here. I still have a few cases that I have been forced to handle internationally. I have sold all of my assests and closed my office. I am now taken basic Swedish language classes to learn the language and I am concerned about employment opportunities for American attorneys. He wishes to buy a home and we have been looking for one reasonably priced. The search has been stressful.

There is an additional element to the above; his sister and I are not friendly. His sister is the only other sibling in his family and she is two years younger than him. Initially, she tried to be my best friend and over the past few years her attitude has changed. There have been a few instances where my fiance and I have disagreed about issues and she has seen me unhappy. The same is true in her relationships. However, seems to hold a severe grudge. I attempted to address any issues she may have against me. She denied any issues but made it clear that she did not like me and did not think that her brother should marry me. The things that she said were very hurtful and believe that she intended them to be hurtful. Needless to say, I don't like her and I don't want to be in her company. He statements to me have been the source of many arguements with my fiance since there have been a few other women, here, who have deceided to openly mistreat me and he wishes to ignore their behavior in hopes that it will go away. Approximately once a month we have a major and sometimes out of control fight about these people and his lack of interception. Yesterday, after one of the wrost fights we have ever had, I calmly told him that I am scheduling myself to leave. I love him when we are alone but we cannot seem to function around his sister and she definitely fuels the aggravation. He still wanted me to keep company with his family and I just cannot bring myself to do it. I feel that he has no sympathy, empathy, or even appreciation for my experiences here and all of my sacrafices. I don't know what to do because I have a history of being bullied by women. My experiences range from neighbors who filed false claims of burglary against me in hopes to evict me to co-workers who have been caught manipulating my files in hopes to demonstrate incompetence. I can't seem to get along with women. I am very nice. I compliment them and always think about their interests, but there are a select few who just grow hateful. I do have some wonderful female friends, but there are still the others who clearly don't like me and make great efforts to undermine me. My friends have noticed this as well. I don't know what to do. I am frustrated and extremely disappointed.
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Re: relationship dissolution (Reply to: 55777 from ****** )
From: Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92
Date: Mon, 21 Nov 2005 22:44:53 +0100
Language: English


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Successful women often have the kind of problems you describe, as they make other women jealous. This is especially common in Sweden where people, who in some way are better than other people, are regarded with suspicion.

If you do not get along with your partner's family, you will all be unhappy. Either try to get a better relation with them or reflect on leaving your fiancé before you are stuck here with children.

You cannot take your children to USA without their father's permission.

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