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KOM2002 (plain)  rebuilding trust & discipline with teenager

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reply Re: rebuilding trust & discipline with teenager , Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92 , 16 Dec 2004 03:27
plain rebuilding trust & discipline with teenager , ****** , 15 Dec 2004 19:15
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rebuilding trust & discipline with teenager
From: ******
Date: Wed, 15 Dec 2004 19:15:25 +0100
Language: English

 


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Teenage daughter - competitive, athletically talented and involved, in the academic maintstream - recenly discovered to be sexually active for some 3 months, against parents' advice and counsel.

This accomplished through direct lies, deception and abuse of limited self responsibilty allowed in her social life. Only discovered when she sought parental help and advice for suspected STD. Trust broken, discipline in doubt. She has expressed remorse and a wish to "get back to a happy life" - i.e. no sex before marriage, happy home, open talk and exchange with parents.

Says she was combatting unspecified 'problems' which she discussed with others who ended up not being able to help. No discussion of 'problems' with mum or dad despite repeated offers/requests.

Also, waiting for HIV & STD test results to return. Worrisome.

Want advice on structure of positive discipline leading to restoration of daughter/parent relationship, but taking into account now proven pattern of deception on daughter's part.

Small, old fashioned, conservative community.
Thanks. I am unsure which button to click, but I woul like a reply to the e-mail address entered.
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Re: rebuilding trust & discipline with teenager (Reply to: 38235 from ****** )
From: Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92
Date: Thu, 16 Dec 2004 03:27:39 +0100
Language: English

 


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Is your daughter 13 or 19 years old? Sooner or later she will have a boyfriend, that you hopefully can accept. It is only a question of time. Discipline usually does not work very well with teenagers. Try to have an open dialogue with your daughter so she feels she can trust you and discuss her problems with you. She needs to feel that you can understand her and that you want to help her to find solutions to her problems. Ask her to always use condoms, if she has sex again, to prevent HIV and other sexually transmitted infections.




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KOM 2002