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KOM2002 (question)  Unfaithful husband cost me a friend

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reply Re: Unfaithful husband cost me a friend , Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92 , 16 Sep 2004 18:19
question Unfaithful husband cost me a friend , ****** , 16 Sep 2004 17:37
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Unfaithful husband cost me a friend
From: ******
Date: Thu, 16 Sep 2004 17:37:21 +0200
Language: English

 


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Hi, my bestfriend's husband came to me about three weeks ago and told me he was attracted to me and asked me if I would sleep with him. I told him no and asked why he would do this. You see I have been friends with his wife for 8 years as well as him being friends with my husband for just as long, I mean we were all very close! I never even thought he was capable of cheating! I was shocked when he told me and even more shocked when I had to give him a direct answer and he seemed stunned that I send no. I asked if he had thought of the consquences and he said yes and that he thought it was worth it!! He didn't want me to say anything to his wife, of course, or my husband. I couldn't keep this from my husband. I told him everyting that was said. He confronted his friend about it and he admitted everything to him word for word. I had decided not to tell his wife because I didn't want to be the one to crush her. But it came out the other day, she had been trying to defend him due to a comment stated by my husband which she didn't think was true and was pretty much telling me my husband was lying and not being honest to me. I couldn't let her put him down like that when I new the truth. Of course she was hurt and didn't even want to hear how anything played out. All I said is that he asked me to have an affair with him and she wanted to talk to him immediatily. I have talked to her once since then (it's been about 3 days) and she said she didn't believe me. I was crying and tried telling her I would never hurt her like that and kept asking her why I would lie. She hung up the phone on me and I called her back right away and told her I wasn't gonna give up on our friendship that easily. She still didn't want to listen and said she needed time. I have tried to call everyday just once to let her know I'm still here for her and that I love her but she never answers. Her husband said she hasn't talked to him either over the last three days, but he is still denying it all happened. Even my husband has tried to convience him to tell her the truth. What do I do now? Even if she decides to talk to me I don't know what to say. To make matters worse my husband works for hers, I think he needs to quit but we aren't in a situation where we can finacially. Help! What would you do??
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Re: Unfaithful husband cost me a friend (Reply to: 33691 from ****** )
From: Gunborg Palme - Leg psykolog - Leg psykoterapeut - Telefon 08-664 60 92
Date: Thu, 16 Sep 2004 18:19:35 +0200
Language: Swedish , English

 


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It is easy to ruin trust and difficult to restore it again. It all depends on how your friend takes this. There is a risk, that she chooses to reject her friendship with you, because she does not want anyone near her, who makes her husband interested. He, of course, is the one to blame, but had you firmly rejected him and then never said anything about it, this sad event had never taken such proportions.



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KOM 2002