Unless this happens too frequently and replaces the necessary intimacy between you as life partners, Shroda is advised to look at this situation differently: men may wish to masturbate to let out steam in some circumstances (often just to play out a fantasy), without having to wait for the right moment to have sex with their partner. This happens because your husband is healthily aroused, not because he has no interest in you. If you wish to minimise the frequency of these episodes (which cannot disappear entirely as long as your husband has spontaneous erections), try one of the following: i) during foreplay, masturbate yourself and encourage him to watch; ii) every now and then, play out some fantasy that you know turns him on, such as seducing him suddenly and unexpectedly, in an unusual place, by inviting him to a motel, etc. Doing this will concentrate his fantasies on you (most of the time).